My Top Five: Evolve Monster Kills


New segment time people! This one is called ‘My Top Five’ where I show my top five game play feats of the current game I’m playing. My Top Fives will be short but serve as both something to show off and highlight awesome stuff in a game. And with that: My Top Five Evolve monster kills!




My top Five – Burgers

Yes it is, Peter Pepper, yes it is.



Yes, yes, YES! Ahem… Ladies and Gentleman I am a Christian (Baptist if you’re wondering) and until recently I, and many Christians, were Fasting; giving up our favorite goodies for the betterment of our souls and in appreciation of the blessings God has given us in our lives (at least that’s my interpretation of fasting anyway). However with the passing of Easter Sunday I can finally get back to the good stuff – which is for me: Burgers! Ah Burger… The sweetest meat of all… Seriously, I was starting to dream about them and in turn was countering the minutes til Sunday (sundown). Since then I’ve gotten myself reacquainted with the great American staple and then I realized why not inform the people of my favorite burger joints, because as we all know proteins are very important to a gamer’s diet. So without further ado, my top five burgers and thus burger places.


Disclaimer = Yes, yes, I know there are many places that cook and sell burgers. A lot of them are local, independent and very delicious; but they’re not readily available everywhere. This list is comprised of more well-known places to buy good burgers so no one misses out.   



5. Hot Pockets (Cheeseburger)




Alright, I don’t want to hear how Hot Pockets are ‘bad for you’ or ‘isn’t real food’ (I get that enough from my mother). The truth is the Hot Pockets are just plain good and their Cheeseburger is one of the best. Hot, juicy, and the melted cheese that binds all the meat and fixings inside together in so inspired that I know it’s the food for astronaut and/or the future. Add to the fact you can buy it in almost any supermarket, corner store, and gas station and there’s no reason why you can’t have a burger at any given moment and at any given time.




4. Burger King



So yeah this is pretty obvious, you want a burger you go to Burger King. Sure they sell other food stuffs; currently they’re selling a healthier menu like salads and smoothies, but come on the burgers are king (ok the Heresy pie is pretty good too).  Now don’t get me wrong both Mc.Donald’s and Wendy’s have very good burgers, but Burger King focus on their paddies (the actually meat) and are usually much bigger in comparison to the Micky D’s (which is mostly bread) and the W (which their paddies are very flat). The only thing a can really complain about is where the heck is the King?!! No not Elvis, he’s dead, I’m taking about the BurgerKing King man. He was the BK mascot for a while and yes I found him a little creepy at first, but when I realized he was just a simple corporate tool wanting to feed me burgers we got along just fine. Now they seem to have an erased him from existence in lieu of famous people. Well, all I got to say is:






3. Denny’s



I really don’t understand the hate people have with Denny’s; the service is always good, they provide free Wi-Fi, they keep things interesting with their some-what bizarre events (Baconalia anyone?), and their menu is absolutely slammin’. Everything is prepared fresh and hot on arrival, can have it prepared anyway you like, comes with plenty of equally good sides and that’s just for the burgers alone. Denny’s is probably the only restaurant I’ll recommend trying something other than the burger menu – but yeah try burger menu first.




2. Dave & Buster’s



Now in my personal opinion, Denny’s has Dave & Buster’s beat (but only by that much) in the way of menu. So why is it ahead of Denny’s? Simply put, video games. After all what’s better than eating a double cheeseburger-cheeseburger; why getting up and walking towards the latest Infinity Blade FX arcade cabinet and using that newly gained energy to get the high score. And that’s why Dave & Buster’s beats Denny’s, if you’re surprised by this revelation then I’m disappointed, you weren’t paying attention to the four years of reading ‘Video Game’ Armada.




1. Mine!


That's right, I'm awesome.


The barrow from a Chinese Proverb – “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” And that’s what I plain to do. I love eating out but let’s face it if it’s between eating out and saving money to buy the Guild Wars 2 Collector’s Edition game I’m going for the game. However that doesn’t mean just riding the ramen train, you can have good burgers at home too! Just follow these simple instructions and eat like a king:


  • Buy ground chuck (90/10 or 80/20 lean)
  • Take a handful and roll it into a ball (Baseball sized should be appropriate, a softball sized one is too big)
  • Slap it down on a big skillet, and turn on the heat on low – for now
  • Then sprinkle each patty with Liquid smoke, meat tenderizer (lightly), basil (dried flakes), and pepper – in that order and only on one side.
  • Turn up the heat to medium high and flip the burgers every five minutes or so til light brown and smelling like it wants to be eaten.
  • Enjoy!



And that’s it, a perfect burger every time. This is my not-so-secret recipe for making good burgers (great for grilling as well) and now all of yours – use it in good eating. Oh, but wait, what about vegetarians you say? Well I got you covered as well; just replace ground chuck with veggie patties and meat tenderizer with vegetable oil (in the pan, not on the v.patties) and you got yourself the same result but not at the cost of a cow ( just plants – but hey at least plants don’t have faces right?). So there you go people, great places to get a decent burger as well as a way to make your own. As for me I think I over induced a bit so I’ll hit the salad bar next time I’m out; but then again you can never have too much of a good thing.